OnFire #71 Faith Means Being Content

I suppose it's the same at your house. Each week the flyers arrive and we open them to examine the sale items from the various stores. Of course, we hope to find bargain prices for some of the items we have been looking for. But since we are not blind to everything else, we also see the goods which we didn't think we needed until we saw them on sale.

"Hey hon - extension cords are on sale."

"Don't you already have a bunch of them?"

"We could always use another."

"You didn't mention that when I asked what you wanted for a gift."

"Well, they're on sale now."

And so it goes. We didn't know we needed it until we saw it on sale. Or, we saw someone else with it, and then we thought, "I'd like to have one of those."

Its interesting to watch our boys. If its shiny and new, they want it. "Can I get one?" We're trying to teach them to be responsible with their money, and we want them to be content with what they have, but at times it feels like an uphill battle.

Contentment is the issue at heart today. Or more properly, lack of contentment. As I see it, there are two basic problems as we tackle this subject. First, we confuse our needs with our desires. "But I neeeeeeeeeed it, I really, reeeeeeally, neeeeeeeeeed it." I heard these words one day in a toy department. Need it? Or want it?

Hopefully we outgrow these little fits, but we often still confuse needs and desires. One of the issues I bump up against is home ownership. We live in a parsonage and someday would like to own a house for ourselves. There is something about being attached to a piece of land and the pride of ownership. This will come eventually, we know, but occasionally it becomes a sore under my saddle, so to speak. I have to remind myself that we have what we need - shelter, heat, food. We do not lack in any of these, and so I must learn to be content.

I have found that the more this confusion (between needs and desires) taps into my fears, the more I feel discontentment. It goes like this. "If I don't have ________ I will miss out on something I really want (health, security, peace of mind, happiness, acceptance, adventure, experience, etc.), and then I'll regret it." Notice two levels of fear - the fear of missing something I want, and the fear of regret later. I could name all sorts of items I have felt this way about over the years.

Second, we fail to see contentment for what it is. Contentment is a spiritual issue, not a material one. When we feel a lack of something, a dissatisfaction or discontentment, we look around us for the answer, when often we need to look within.

"I'm feeling really cruddy today. Oh, and look, there's that old sofa. We need a new sofa. That's the solution - If I had a new sofa, I would feel better." We begin to see that our problems lie in the things we have (or don't have). We can substitute lots of words for "sofa." "Clothes," "car," tools," "food." Sadly, some people even substitute names of others. "If only I had another spouse, I would be happy."

Contentment is a spiritual issue. Faith means trusting in God that he has provided the things I really need, and he will continue to provide what I need in the future. Check out these passages on contentment.

Philippians 4:11-13 I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

1 Timothy 6:6-8 But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that.

Hebrews 13:5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

How do I handle discontentment? First, I have to realize when it rises within me. Often the feeling comes disguised as something else, like frustration. For instance, when the chainsaw won't start, I get on a mental track which reminds me about all the other things around the house which need repair or replacement. My frustration level rises and I think, "I would feel a lot better if only all this stuff worked the way it should." Aha! Now I'm at discontentment. I can name this feeling and deal with it rather than stew about it and take it out on everyone else.

I ask myself, "What do I really want?" For a while I was in a real funk about wanting a boat. Think of all the fun things we could do as a family! It occurred to me one day that most of the things I wanted to do as a family did not actually have anything to do with a boat. We could have lots of fun, go places, and create memories without being on the water. When I realized there were other ways to accomplish what I really wanted, my discontentment disappeared.

I also keep a journal. I use it as a way to tell God what I'm thinking. I lay out my hopes and dreams, my frustrations. I've often found that the exercise of writing helps clarify issues, and I sometimes I experience God's voice speaking within my spirit to calm or comfort me.

I come back to the promises God has given us: I can do everything through him who gives me strength. I will never leave you or forsake you. God knows what I need. If I will trust him, I'll experience more joy and peace in my situation.