OnFire #78 Daring to Tell the Truth

Daniel 4:19 Then Daniel (also called Belteshazzar) was greatly perplexed for a time, and his thoughts terrified him. So the king said, "Belteshazzar, do not let the dream or its meaning alarm you."

Tug of war was always one of my favourite games because knew I wouldn't be picked last. Being taller and bigger than most children my age meant I was a favoured for the important "anchor" position at the end of the rope.

Daniel faced a tug of war in his soul that day as he appeared before King Nebuchadnezzar to interpret another one of his troubling dreams. Thankfully, Nebby didn't put him under pressure to tell him the dream also. We saw that in chapter 2.

The pressure this time was different. The meaning of the dream was not what Nebby would want to hear, and it troubled Daniel to be the bearer of such news. Essentially, the king would lose his sanity for a time until he acknowledged that God, and not he, ruled the universe (4:24-27).

Imagine the tug of war in Daniel's soul. He knew the meaning of the dream, but must have struggled against the implications. The king could disagree and have him killed on the spot. During the king's insanity, there could be a palace coup and the advisors killed. Any way he looked at it, it was not good. If he was right, he would be the hero, but if not....

We have all faced the struggle of whether to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. We have faced the temptation to say something other than the truth, to pad our words to make the truth seem less harsh, to make ourselves look better than we are, to protect ourselves, or to tell someone what they want to hear.

I face this all the time. I once had a small group leader who talked too much, ruining the group dynamic. I didn't look forward to telling him because I feared it would be emotionally difficult, his feelings might be hurt, or he might make difficulty within the church.

The day came for our conversation. "So I'm talking too much in the group?" he asked. He thought for a moment, while I fretted. What was next?

"OK," he said. "That's easy. I won't talk as much." Sure enough, he talked less, and people opened up more. My heart lifted.

I have found over time that waiting does not make it better, so I try not to delay. Our natural tendency is to procrastinate in situations like this. If we are going to avoid something, it should be to avoid putting it off.

Lying never helps. We face this temptation, but we must resist. If someone wants it tomorrow but this is impossible, we need to tell them. There is an interesting story about Billy Graham. When he started preaching, he told his people they would have accurate counts. Even preachers face pressure to "pad" the numbers.

Going along with the group is easy to do, but we should speak up anyway. In planning a family conference one time with a group of senior pastors, I bowed to the group and didn't push for public advertising. They thought it would be enough to use our local churches and since they were older and more experienced, I went along. Attendance was poor. I should have said something before it was too late.

There are better ways than others to tell the truth. "I'm not sure that's a good idea," is better than, "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

I have faced the other side of this issue. Sometimes people won't give me honest feedback because they are afraid it will upset me or hurt my feelings. Meanwhile problems get worse. I appreciate honest feedback, but I also know that I must receive it graciously, without attacking or demeaning the person giving it to me. That doesn't mean I have to agree with it all, however.