Its been quite a week, and God needs to be thanked. In one week we hosted a youth mission trip, helped a man in our church move, painted a house, conducted a funeral, and held our morning worship service. Thank you, Lord for such a productive week!!
I had several "oops" moments this week. Its kind of humbling. I think I finally figured out how I accidentally sent my magazine article query to the OnFire list. An interesting thing happened after that. I had so many positive comments from people. I was truly blessed. Some thought it was my best OnFire yet. Others were disappointed there wasn't more. Your reactions convinced me to move up my plans to write a book. Over vacation, I'll start looking for publishers who might be interested. I'm told this can be a very slow process, and not to be afraid of rejection.
We're ready for vacation. In the morning we'll get up and drive to PEI. We'll park our camper at my mother's cottage, set up, visit relatives, and play on the water. Also, my grandfather has been in the hospital so please include him in your prayers.
There won't be an OnFire for 2 weeks while I'm on vacation. I love writing, but you'll excuse me for taking a break. However, this week, I'll start with some letters developing the ideas you read about in my article query. These are going to be longer letters since they are bigger ideas and issues than I normally deal with in OnFire.
I've become convinced that while we talk a lot about faith, we fall short on understanding what it means in day to day living.
For instance, we talk about the Christian "faith." By this we mean the body of beliefs in Christianity. These doctrines are important since they define what we believe. It is not always easy to see, however, how these doctrines work out practically.
Then there is "coming to faith." This happens when someone initially trusts in Jesus for salvation. This is exciting for the new believer and it is a time of celebration for the local church. Baptism often follows instruction through new believers classes, but living out the faith is not always obvious to young Christians.
We support "faith" missions. These missions are ones where missionaries receive no guarantee of support from the sponsoring missions agency. They must raise their support through speaking, letter writing, and most of all, prayer. It seems that the more desperate or dire the circumstances of the mission, the more the missionaries are upheld as models of what it means to trust God. I find such stories of God's provision incredibly inspiring, but to be honest I find it hard to relate because I have always had a steady salary. I have experienced God's provision, but it doesn't take much faith to see my pay check. Does this mean I don't have faith?
Finally, in times of trouble, we are told to "have faith." There is nothing wrong with this, but does this mean faith is not necessary until I have a problem? I don't think that's right. The language of faith doesn't always help us understand what day-to-day faith means.
So, what does faith mean? What does it look like every day? I believe theology ought to be practical, so we are not talking about some esoteric, ivory tower exercise. Over the last 18 months of writing OnFire, I developed some definite ideas about what faith means as we relate to our families, go to work, and serve in our churches and communities.
For starters, faith means we can't go with God and stay where we are.
This can be both literally true and metaphorically true. It was literally true for Abraham, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Joshua, Ruth, Ezra, Nehemiah, many of the prophets, Joseph and Mary, James and John, Simon Peter and Andrew, Paul, and so many others. Even though their journeys were literal, they were doing more than going from point A to point B. They trusted that God was leading them to something better. To remain where they were was to miss out at the very least, to be disobedient otherwise. Their journeys were part of their spiritual growth. Along the way they learned trust and obedience.
The problem is, we constantly face the temptation to be comfortable. It doesn't matter whether the situation is good or bad, we like the predictability of the here and now over the uncertainty of the future.
Think about Moses on the mountain with God. Moses faced the temptation to be comfortable in a good place while God was calling him to a better place. In Deuteronomy 1:6 God told him, "You have stayed long enough at this mountain."
The mountain was a wonderful experience for Moses. He met directly with God to receive the covenant. While others could not even step foot on the holy mountain, Moses and a few select people, including Joshua, experienced the glory of the Lord in a way which no other humans have ever experienced. Upon coming down from the mountain, Moses had to put a veil over his face because it so radiated with the glory of the Lord that he frightened people (Ex. 34:29ff).
I know how I've felt after a "mountain-top experience." I remember as a teen being at camp, and so feeling God's presence that I didn't want to leave. As an adult I've been to conferences where I've felt enfolded in God's glory, and dreaded going home because I was afraid to leave this experience behind.
There was safety, security, and God's presence where they were, but this was not where God called them to be. God had led them out of Egypt to go to the Promised Land in Canaan. Anything less would be short of the goal, and so they could not remain where they were and go with God at the same time. It was time to break camp.
That was a good situation, but sometimes people are afraid to leave even their bad situations to go with God. It's a little like the old saying, "Better the devil you know than the one you don't." Because the future is unclear and uncertain, people are reluctant to trade what is familiar even if it is not good, for something which is not guaranteed. I remember counselling a Christian woman in an abusive common-law relationship who would not leave because she was convinced she would never find another man.
That's a little outside my own experience, but I can still identify with the impulse to stick with what I know even if it is not great. Embarrassments in my childhood years led me to create a thick protective emotional shell. I was determined to be like Spock - no emotions. This proved a little unrealistic, but I found I could still keep up the shield. I had a one-strike rule. I would open up until someone hurt me, and then no more. Of course, this was also unrealistic. But that's the way I lived for a long time. I came to a point where I realized I had few friends, and the only way forward was to open up a little. It wasn't easy, but proved itself.
That was tough. And then in the last few years God once again called me forward with him to a new level of openness and vulnerability. God used the Arrow Leadership course to help me open up as a pastor and leader in a whole new way. It has not been easy. Without the intervention I experienced in my first week of Arrow, it would not even have been possible. I tell this because to me it points out one of the ways it was easier to remain where I was, even though it wasn't great emotionally. As I look back, I am now convinced I was headed for an emotional breakdown from protecting myself.
Do you remember the old game show hosted my Monty Hall called "Let's Make a Deal?" The tension mounted as contestants were offered the chance to trade their prize for something behind doors #1, 2, or 3. Sometimes the prize was better, sometimes not.
We treat decisions about discipleship like this. Maybe I'll trade my present lifestyle and choices for something which could be better, maybe I won't - It depends on whether I believe God will take me to a better place. If I do, I'll go, I'll obey. If I doubt, I won't make any changes.
Past experiences and hurts can affect our willingness to go with God. We might be reluctant if we feel angry with God. While I was a student pastor, my supervisor talked with me about my public prayers. They didn't seem very personal. I couldn't tell him at the time what was going on. It was too personal, and still is, but because of it I was angry with God. It took quite a long time to work that out.
On the other hand, a sense that God has carried us through a difficult time can give us confidence to go with him. After we experienced some upset over my ministry in our last church, I developed a sense that God would see us through regardless of the outcome in the church. In a sense, it really didn't matter what happened to us because God was with us.
I don't want you to have the wrong impression. It was not easy. I didn't sleep a full night for three months. Nor do I want you to think badly about that church. However, I learned some incredible lessons about God's faithfulness which allowed us to take the next steps in our journey forward with him.
Don't get the impression, either, that I've got some kind of super-faith. I think our level of faith goes up and down. I hope mine is increasing over the long-term, but I know that some days I believe more than on other days. Some days I feel more peace, some days more anxiety. Some days I am confident and other days I blow it.
Fear may also hinder us from going with God. We've talked a little about this already - the fact that the future is uncertain. But there are other fears. How much will it cost me? How much time will it take? What will God ask me to do? If I do this, then what will (insert name of person) say? What will my family think? Will I be embarrassed? Will I be out of my element?
I'd love to write more, but for now time is running out. Its late, and tomorrow we leave. When I return, I write about our next topic, "Faith means better days ahead."
This letter published July 20, 2006